Hello Pie Blog, my old friend … I’ve come to post on you again.

Note that this concerns events which took place in October 2024 — I am somewhat behind in updating the blog.

My final day of a month-long sojourn in Europe touring primarily through the Axis countries, I returned to the Allied stronghold of London for the flight home. But my business was not yet done, for there was time enough for a visit to a local public house — The Porcupine (a Nicholson’s pub).

I ventured into The Porcupine and made enquiries of food and drink. A pint of Nicholson’s Pale Ale soon manifested before I made my way upstairs to the dining area. There to greet me was a fellow whom I would later find out was a fellow antipodean (Rhys/Reece (etc.) originally of Sydney, soon to be of Brisbane), alongside a couple visiting from the United States (Pam and Richard, both hailing from Atlanta, Georgia, though it was noted that Pam was originally from Texas).

Anyway, I sat myself down and perused the menu. I had already contemplated that this would be an ideal opportunity to try one of the local pies, having had one on a previous visit in 2023. I saw on offer a Beef Rib, Shin and Brisket Pie (£22; approx. $44 AUD at time of purchase — a much more expensive option than usual but accompanied by mashed potatoes, roast carrots, and gravy) and thought that this premium offering was just the ticket.

The pie arrived after not too short a wait. Not the usual pie to appear on this blog of course, having only the piecrust top rather than being a fully encased pie. That crust appeared flaky and golden, a beef bone peered through, an enticing proposition. I tucked in.

The pastry was indeed soft and flaky, buttery and savoury. But the real winner here was the meat inside which was quite marvellous. This was by no means fine dining but it was exactly what I was looking for. The beef was tender and rich, the red wine sauce lovely, everything seasoned to perfection. The additional gravy was not at all necessary but added even more richness and flavour to the dish, the mashed potatoes and carrot a lovely sideshow to the main event. The experience was made all the more enjoyable through the refreshing cask ale that followed the pie down my gullet, and the bonhomie between myself, the Americans, and my fellow Australian.

A most excellent pie, and a most excellent experience. Of course, it comes at a premium price, but that is largely to be expected in London (and if you tell yourself that you’re paying $22 instead of £22, it doesn’t seem quite so bad).

The Porcupine is a picturesque pub near Leicester Square and various tourist traps, featuring a charming drinking area on the ground floor and a lovely dining area above. They appear to offer a number of pies, including the British Steak & Nicholson’s Pale Ale Pie, which was apparently awarded gold at the ‘British Pie Awards’.

At the end of May, I endured a day of air travel in an attempt to (inter alia) escape the winter set to befall the southern hemisphere and instead enjoy a northern hemisphere summer, if only for a short while. Somewhat foolishly, in that regard at least, I ventured first to London, and thus was met with not-quite-summer (the weather was generally fine, I shouldn’t be too critical).

I landed at Heathrow, waited an inordinate amount of time for my baggage to arrive via the conveyor belt (witnessing about three instances of the system breaking down so as to extend the delay), made my way to the tube wherein I took the Picadilly Line, before finally arriving at my hotel. I felt putrid–the time spent in the aircraft environment was not kind to my sense of my own hygiene. Filth, everywhere. No less my mouth, subjected to multiple airline meals without any brushing of the teeth, not so much as a chewed gum.

I cleansed myself. I scrubbed away the detritus, expelled the self-loathing with hot water, steam, soap–at last, I brushed my teeth, the mint toothpaste a glorious sensation, finally. The mouthwash topped it all off.

Now that I was clean, I was prepared to explore the city. I had left at 8pm AEST, arrived in Hong Kong at 3am local time, and then arrived in the UK capital at about 4pm local time. This timeline meant I was out of sorts. But not so out of sorts as to deny myself a visit to a pub. T’was the first of many pubs on the trip. But this is a pie blog, not a pub blog, and so I shall not dwell on that thought.

I, and the two companions up with whom I met in Lun-dun, sallied forth to the tube station in search of the Elephant and Castle in the Kensington locality (not in Elephant and Castle, which I understand to be a locality in its own right, and a shit one at that). After waiting a ludicrous amount of time for the circle line or the northern line or the who-fuck-knows-which line, we were on our way. A couple of stops and a short walk later and there we were–the promised pub.

The place was bursting at the seams, the local white collar workers having made their way in numbers to imbibe and engage in polite conversation with their colleagues/get smashed after work. We procured drinks and then bade our time, striking once a table inside freed up.

Ah, the menu… fish and chips … sausage and mash … pie! To be specific, the Steak & Nicholson’s Pale Ale Pie (£16.50, served with mashed potato, gravy, and veg–The Elephant and Castle is a Nicholson’s establishment, Nicholson’s being proprietors of a large number pubs in London and the UK more broadly–I was in fact in the presence of a former employee of Nicholson’s, this very pub in fact, who fiendishly sought out these pubs for their cask ale in particular). This was just the ticket after the long journey–what better way to settle in to my new surrounds than gorging myself on pie?

The pie was quite the sight to behold. A large, rectangular object, distinct from the pies one typically finds in the antipodes. This was an imposing beast of a pie.

I got stuck in without delay. The pastry was nothing special, it plainly had a practical function. The structural integrity of this pie was obvious to all who came before it–this was a sturdy thing.

But it was no match for my voracious appetite. And so I penetrated the perfectly adequate case, reaching the beefy insides. The filling was beef bits rather than minced meat, though not chunky steak. Also there was onion. The filling was mild and uncomplicated, there wasn’t much else going on. Unfortunately it was a bit under-seasoned, but the gravy on the side made up for this. In the end, this was an enjoyable enough pie, without being anything particularly special.

One of my companions (the ex-employee) had the same. When asked for his verdict, he proferred the two-word response ‘fucking excellent’.

My other companion had opted for the vegan pie offering–the Puy Lentil & Vegetable Cottage Pie (£16.50). This was apparently most satisfying, having an impressive umami quality for lentils.

The menu at the Elephant and Castle features one further pie (a chicken pie) and otherwise has what appears to be standard British pub food. The Steak & Nicholson’s Pale Ale Pie also appears to be present at a number of other Nicholson’s establishments which serve food.

It was a most pleasant experience and a good time was had by all. As it turned out, it was the only pie for the trip. Very decent but, based on this experience, I think we have the poms beat, not only in the Ashes, but also for pies.